Stachetastic hat at Hot Topic

Stachetastic hat at Hot Topic

Mr. Mustache in Sarasota, FL

Mr. Mustache in Sarasota, FL

Mustache sandwich cutter

Mustache sandwich cutter

Wynwood Walls. Miami, Fl

Wynwood Walls. Miami, Fl

Wynwood Walls. Miami, Fl

Wynwood Walls. Miami, Fl

Wynwood Walls. Miami, Fl

Wynwood Walls. Miami, Fl

Mustache earth.

Mustache earth.

I fit right in.

I fit right in.

Lester’s: beer, wine, coffee and a wall dedicated to mustaches. Wynwood Miami, Fl

Lester’s: beer, wine, coffee and a wall dedicated to mustaches. Wynwood Miami, Fl

Mustache bracelet found in St. Augustine, Fl

Mustache bracelet found in St. Augustine, Fl

Mustache in Amy Sedaris’ book, Simple Times: Crafts for Poor People!

Mustache in Amy Sedaris’ book, Simple Times: Crafts for Poor People!

It states in the bible, every time a mustache is shaved an angel in heaven dies and falls to earth. It also says that you shall not suggest interventions on awesome mustached Americans.

As my great-great-great grandmother twice removed, Mark Twain-Tubman-Jefferson, used to say, “In heaven, all the interesting mustaches are missing.”

Mustachelicious!

Mustachelicious!

Check out my mustache nails!

Check out my mustache nails!